Emma Louise Jessie Urquhart was born on 09th July 1981. Emma’s parents were Valerie and Spencer.
Unfortunately, Emma didn’t have the best start in life. Her parents weren’t together, and Emma’s mum struggled with alcohol.
Emma was taken into foster care and sadly lost her mum when she was young.
This was probably the beginning of her own issues. Emma developed an eating disorder whilst she was still at school.
Emma met her childhood sweetheart, Tony, they settled down and bought a house. Emma has a great job where she got to travel the world. From what I know, she was happy at that point. Emma and Tony had a baby which they both loved and cared for.
Unfortunately, Emma’s mental health was still untreated. She suffered with depression and sadly the antidepressants weren’t enough. She drank to excess and used other substances to cope. Eventually, Emma and Tony split up.
That’s when I, Tony number 2(!) came into her life. We hit it off straight away. The problem was we both liked to party too much. In one way, we were bad for each other as neither of us knew when to stop. In another way, we loved each other very, very much. We moved in together and tried to build a life together.
We had two children which Emma doted on. Emma was an amazing mum to all three children.
For a long time, we managed our addictions while the children were in bed or away for the weekend.
Unfortunately, as with many stories of addiction, the illness progressed, and things got worse. Emma began to use more and more. In the end, the party drugs stopped, and the harder drugs came into play. Emma asked for help but the response from her doctor was “if I log what you just said, I will have to report you to social services.” Emma chose to walk away
Inevitably, social services did get involved in the end and the children were taken.
Emma’s world got smaller and smaller as all the people she cared about disappeared. This was the worst point for Emma. I was in prison, so she was on her own.
She became pregnant and got a space in a rehab. She believed that if she could get well, she would keep the baby. Sadly, this isn’t what happened. Her baby boy was put up for adoption. She got to spend the first week of his life with him then had to hand him over. At this point Emma had gone through the rehab and was doing well.
Once her boy was gone, she tried to stay clean but sadly she relapsed. She was never a bad person, just controlled by her addiction. She did many things that she hated doing, but she was totally powerless.
In 2019 we both went to prison. This was our chance to get some help. Emma took her chance and completed her 34-month sentence. She some out with a good chunk of clean time. She relocated to Kent and started The Forward Trust Day Programme. She completed that and began to volunteer. She started to live her best life! She went to many events around the country and eventually got a paid position within Forward Trust.
Sadly, she started to use in secret and soon lost her job and home. Emma was so scared that she would lose what she had built by admitting what was going on and asking for help. In her mind she would lose everything.
That wasn’t true, she may have lost her job and home, but she didn’t lose me and her friends. We all supported her, and she built herself back up to be stronger than she had ever been before. She got to offload a lot of the guilt and shame she was carrying around. She started to attend CA and built up a massive support group. She started to volunteer again, and she built a beautiful home again.
I can honestly say she was the happiest she had ever been.
Emma was an amazing person. Everyone who came into contact with her loved her. If she smiled, the room smiled. If she laughed, the room laughed. She was a beautiful soul.
I last spoke to Emma on the 04th July. She was found on 05th July. She had relapsed and sadly died.
She was loved by so many people. She has left a hole in so many lives.
Written by Emma's partner, Tony
Comments